It’s finally time: you can get stepped on by the tall vampire lady. While my peers have advised readers to not be killed by Lady Dimitrescu, I’m here to say that it’s actually cool and good to be crushed to death by a tall vampire. Forget the haters! Get trampled upon, comrades! If you just can’t wait for that moment, you can can buy the console versions on Amazon for $50. Now prepare to perish under Lady D’s 17.3 inch shoes.
This story was originally published by Giovanni Colantonio on 04/30/2021 and updated by Joe Tilleli with new information on 07/07/2021.