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Anker: Fuck Everything, We're Doing 10 Ports

Anker PowerPort 10 60W Charger | $28 | Amazon | Promo code ANKERPQ2
Anker PowerPort 10 60W Charger | $28 | Amazon | Promo code ANKERPQ2
Graphic: Shep McAllister
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Int. Board Room - Night

Anker executive: I want a charger with 10 ports.

Anker engineer: That’s madness sir, that’s too many ports.

Anker executive: <Takes drag from unreleased Anker vape> Is there any way I could change your mind? <Suddenly shouting> Alexa, turn on the light.

Both men look to the corner of the room, where the Eufy Genie has illuminated a Eufy smart light bulb, revealing a body guard who had been hiding in the shadows. He approaches the engineer and binds his hands and legs behind the chair with PowerLine+ Lightning cables, and covers his mouth with Anker-branded packing tape.

Anker executive: 10 ports.

Anker enginner: <Nods, weeping>

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